Huw Edwards delivering nightly bulletin:
David Cameron is to make a sensational return to the public arena following his summer break this year. Government sources say Mr Cameron will be appearing on screen starring in a network drama as a fictitious character dealing with on-the-spot international crises… he’s also lined up for Johnny English The Third in 2012.
Today, a powerful all party committee of MPs announced that Britain is on the verge of facing further anarchy over the continuing surge of Government cuts…..the celebrities in this year’s Big Brother have threatened a sponsored silence in protest against no “lugggzzzzury bedroom” in the year house.
And on the subject of cuts… George Osborne is to follow in the footsteps of his senior: fashionably starring in a drama documentary of his life with troublesome vice girl Natalie Rowe. The ongoing series – inspired by his current battle as chancellor of the exchequer will be advertised as “The Return of George and The Dragon”…..